yeah

there is something important about having a list
it doesn't matter whether or not it is written
having tasks pressing on my mind gives me a sense of purpose
maybe a sense of guilt.

I just decided not to do something that has been on my list for ages.

It is an important career thing

and I have a busy year ahead

and I have been telling myself that this is something I should just do. 

So just do it. 

not my photo

there comes a point when leaping hurdle after hurdle becomes a chore. 

right now I want to relax

to pursue more interesting endeavours.

I remember a time when I could read page after page of uninteresting documents, learning the nuances of policies that were entirely unnecessary. I must have had so much brain space. 

How times have changed. 

Nowadays I fly through documents looking for key words, quickly becoming frustrated and impatient... looking for shortcuts, stumbling, cursing... there has to be a better way. 

For now, I have decided to take the pressure off. This job will do itself when it is ready to be done. No more forcing things that aren't ready. 

(not my picture)

... and half a thousand dollars will be with me for another year or two